December 2011
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Lesson Learned: Men Know What They Want
“Until I was 30, I dated only boys. I’ll tell you why: Men scared the shit out of me. Men know what they want. Men own alarm clocks. Men sleep on a mattress that isn’t on the floor. Men buy new shampoo instead of adding water to a nearly empty bottle of shampoo. Men make reservations. Men go in for a kiss without giving you some long preamble about how they’re thinking of kissing you.
Boys are...
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Lesson Learned: If you have to ask, you can't...
“If you have to ask someone to change, to tell you they love you, to bring wine to dinner, to call you when they land, you can’t afford to be with them. It’s not worth the price, even though, just like the Tiffany catalogue, no one tells you what that price is. You have a sense of when you’re about to go bankrupt. Your own sense of self-worth takes the wheel and says, Enough of this shit. Stop...
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“the korean and indian kids i would hang out with would make fun of white people...”
– Himanshu Kumar Suri (Heems) of Das Racist, on growing up in Queens.
[still can’t believe my high school VP is now a rapper. Stuy heads be going placez]
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“You are human tennis elbow. You are a pizza burn on the roof of the...”
– Troy Barnes, Community
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a clash of kings
Cersei: Do you want to be loved, Sansa?
Sansa: Everyone wants to be loved.
Cersei: I see flowering hasn't made you any brighter. Sansa, permit me to share a bit of womanly wisdom with you on this very special day. Love is poison. A sweet poison, yes, but it will kill you all the same.
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